Truth - "You should write about truth"
I am a storyteller. This place is my medium.
This is not a story, though. Today, its is a fraction of my truth. I am sensitive, emotional, passionate, loving, caring, trying to be authentic.
I have made mistakes, fallen so much, hurt other people, had been betrayed, hurt and bullied. But, I love life. So much that no matter what happens to me, how much it hurts I get up and try again. I saw the reality of two men yesterday. Two men who I have loved and cared for deeply. One wanted revenge, he called me names, told me that he will destroy me: I do not know if he can beyond what he had already done.
The other used every bit of information, true and fiction to ask me to leave the house. He leveraged what I hold most to my heart, loves of my life, to touch that raw nerve. Motherhood. I want to cry, but I am not going to. I am going to get to work. Accusations or blames or bullying is not new to me. I grew up with them, I have survived many. So I will survive this too. One challenged me to write the truth. I will, some day. But this place is where I write stories. And I am not changing who I am to prove to anyone, as there is no one but myself and universe and God that I feel I need to be clear with. It's not easy, I will not lie about that. I have seen the worst side of people for 4 years. And I saw the worst of 3 yesterday.
Sometimes I do think what will be the worst that can happen more than where I am. Death? I do not fear it, as I feel it's just a dimension change for my soul. I have enough truth said and written in places if some day my kids go looking for it. It's not time for truth yet. But a day will come, a time will be set, and truth will be told. Luv